Spent a lovely day yesterday in the company of the puddles, children played mostly very well and Merry and I nattered away.

Today has not been so good. It started with Charlie waking up at 3am and being damn obnoxious when asked to go back to sleep. He kept insisting that as it was after midnight it was the next day and therefore the morning and time to get up. I have no clue what it was all about and he continually kept getting up and I just dealt with it all really badly by yelling at him. When Bev got up to get ready for work he dived in our bed and then refused to get up and have breakfast and get dressed!

More yelling and impossible to win arguments ensued and I really got to the end of my tether and ended up with a very sore throat.

My parents picked him up at 10am to take him away for the weekend and so now I just feel so guilty that I spent 7 hours yelling at him when he's gone away.

Turned my pc on and saw that I've got an order and that made me cry because its going to be awkward one to wrap.

Sat down to start some work and having taken one look at the huge box of files and the other huge pile of files I just burst into tears. Mother phoned up at yelled at me for not having already completed x, y and z so I cried again. I so don't do crying.

I'm not feeling like I've got a very good grip on life today. I don't know whether its the hormone tablets but I'm seriously considering getting the consultant to sign me off work for the next 6 weeks when the IVf will be over.

Spoke to the clinic this morning and they are concerned about the side effects the pill is having on me this time and concerned that I've been bleeding so long, so they've booked me a scan for Monday.

I've just managed to finish one file and then looked at the rest and lost it again. Talk about hanging on to a thread.